How I Set Up My Daily Life To Manage Chronic Pain
/By Crystal Lindell
I’ve been dealing with severe chronic pain for more than a decade now, most of which is due to the intercostal neuralgia I have in my ribs. So, at this point, my entire life is basically set up to accommodate that.
While some people may read that paragraph and assume that I have a sad life consumed by pain, I prefer to think of it as my way of fighting back.
By planning for and accepting my pain, I can live without added stress and burdens. As a result, I don’t let my pain lead – instead I get to lead my pain.
My daily schedule is flexible, so that I can adjust it to my pain as I’m able, doing more when I can and resting when I need to. I keep things as stress-free as possible because stress escalates my pain. And I try to work with my body instead of against it.
So what does that look like on a typical day in my life?
Well, I usually wake up for the first time at around 4:30 am to the sound of my orange cat Goose screaming at the top of his lungs because he’s hungry. I take a second to see how much my back hurts today and decide the best method for getting out of bed. My goal is always to get out of bed without needing help from my fiancé Chris.
Then I go to the kitchen to feed Goose and our other three cats – Princess D, Basil, and Goldie. I love them, so they get wet food before I even eat my own morning breakfast: Two Advil; one pain pill; a spoonful of kratom washed down with orange Gatorade; and a cup of hot coffee.
I go to sleep at about 8 pm most nights, so I check my phone first thing to catch up on any messages I get from loved ones overnight. I also throw the news on our TV so I can catch up on the slew of horrible things that likely happened in the world overnight.
After “breakfast” I lay out a yoga mat and grab my pillow so I can lay on the floor for a bit as the news continues in the background. There’s something about laying on the ground that helps alleviate the vicious back pain I’ve been dealing with ever since throwing out my back a few weeks ago.
Anytime I try to skip this new floor ritual, I regret it, so I have now built it into my daily schedule to stare at the ceiling multiple times a day. Our black cat Basil always curiously crawls around my head wondering what I’m doing in her realm of the house – the floor.
Then I get the food dishes ready for the outside cats that I take care of and run those outside to help them survive the long, cold Midwest winter.
Depending on how busy my day ahead is, I’ll then sometimes lay down for another hour or so while letting my morning medication cocktail kick in.
When I get back up, I make another cup of coffee, which usually ends up sitting half-finished on our coffee table until it gets cold and I give up on it. Despite the fact that this happens almost every day, I still keep making that second cup of coffee thinking today will be the day I finally finish it.
I don’t work full time in large part due to my health, so I don’t have to get ready to leave the house most days. But that doesn’t mean I just sit around watching TikTok all day. I make ends meet by doing freelance writing work, and by running an online Lego store with Chris via a website called Bricklink.
If I have writing assignments due, I start mulling that over in my brain, while simultaneously checking in on our Bricklink store to see if any orders came in overnight. Chris handles most of the packing and shipping, but if we are especially busy, I jump in and help pull orders.
Because my rib pain gets worse the longer I’m awake, I also try to cook any food for the day in the morning because cooking is a very draining task in and of itself. That means I’ll often start a pot of soup or a casserole by 9 a.m. Personally, I actually like dinner food for breakfast, so depending on how long that takes to make, I’ll generally have a serving to start my day.
I also try to make double batches of any meals, and then freeze them in a portion-size silicone ice cube tray to essentially make my own homemade frozen dinners. That way, when I’m having an especially bad pain day, I have quick meal options.
After cooking, I head to my couch and figure out the rest of my plans for the day.
This time of year, when the temperatures here in northern Illinois are almost always below freezing, I do a lot of life from my couch under a heated blanket, with our long-hair tortoiseshell cat Princess D on my shoulder.
Sometimes that means I even do some writing directly on my phone, if I’m in too much pain to pull out my laptop.
After a few hours of work, I usually have another round of ibuprofen, prescription pain meds, and kratom in the afternoon with my lunch, which is often another serving of whatever food I made that morning.
Then I’ll try to shower. I don’t know if it’s because of the way that I have to move my arms to wash my hair or because there’s just a lot of standing involved, but showers genuinely wipe me out, so I have to set aside time to both take a shower and then recover for a bit on the couch. After I get dressed, I have to lay on the floor again for about 15 minutes for my back.
Most days I wear extremely comfortable clothing because I can’t risk any additional discomfort to my ailing body. So if I’m staying home for the day I’ll just directly opt for pajamas, but if I’m visiting my mom — who lives a couple blocks away — I’ll throw on some lounge pants and T-shirt.
In both cases though, I’ll also throw on some compression socks just to keep my feet from swelling up because of all the ibuprofen I take.
I’ll also throw on some very light makeup just to give myself a little pick me up. Then, I will often run over to my mom’s house to drop off some food for her and my grandma to eat for dinner.
After I get home, I’ll spend time catching up on social media, which helps me feel like I have a social life despite the fact that I spend most of my time at home.
I also am still trying to avoid catching COVID because I don’t want to risk adding to my health issues, so I limit my time at large social gatherings as much as possible. That means most of my communication with loved ones is via text and the occasional FaceTime call.
So I take some time in the later afternoon on the couch, while Chris rubs my feet, to catch up with people I care about while also playing the daily New York Times Connections and Wordle Games.
Part of running the Bricklink store means that, aside from pulling orders, our other big task is adding Lego parts to our inventory, so I try to work on that in the evening before feeding the cats dinner and then winding down the night.
Then, like I said, I’m in bed by about 8 pm because dealing with chronic pain is exhausting. So after one last round of Advil, pain medication, and kratom, I’ll get under the heated blanket in our bed and scroll social media on my phone for a bit before falling asleep with our tabby cat Goldie cuddled up next to my head.
I could see how a healthy person might read this day-in-the-life story and come away thinking I have a pretty plain existence. But I love spending my days in my cozy, small-town apartment, cuddling my cats on-demand and running an online Lego store with my fiancé.
It’s back when I was trying to pretend that pain didn’t exist that I was miserable, constantly overdoing it, and ending up either in the emergency room sobbing in pain, or at home awake all night with pain-somnia.
Pain forces you to go with the flow, to embrace the world as it is and work with it, instead of against it. It’s only when I accepted that fact, that I found true happiness.
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